Don't even THINK about naming your baby Gloria! According to this book, "there has never been one documented case of a Gloria arriving on time for an important event..." And definitely don't name your baby boy Harold. According to the book, "Harold is a real schlep name, the type of small time actuary who leaves his wife and kids for a woman he's met at an airport bar." Quick, get this book before your banish your newborn by naming them something dumb!